Over the last couple of years, I’ve been given an insight into the problem with things. Three relatives have all died unexpectedly, leaving behind an overwhelming amount of stuff. I’ve seen those left behind (myself included) struggle with what to do with all these things. It can be hard to let go when something is related to how life used to be. At other times, you’re more than happy to clear the room … but there’s just so much to deal with. So why do we do this to ourselves?
Holding on gives us a sense of control
If you own sixteen pairs of scissors, you’ll always be ready to cut something, right? Backup dishes means you can be ready to host 12 people at the drop of a hat. Who knows when you might want to where that old t-shirt again? Imagine how annoyed you’d be if you wanted to read that book again in five years time but you threw it out!
Underlying all this is a desire for control and certainty. It’s a wish to be prepared for any situation and avoid discomfort or uncertainty when faced with the lack of something. Because yes, maybe if you get rid of the extra dishes you will come up short when you hold a big event.
In reality, the control we feel from holding on is an illusion. Sometimes, the stuff is really controlling us. No matter how many things we hold onto, we can’t see the future and we will be caught unawares by things as we go through life.
Having less things can actually provide a sense of calm which gives us back some freedom in our lives. There’s more room in your house. You spend less time cleaning. You know what you own and can use, enjoy and maintain it properly. Hey, you might even be able to save money by buying a smaller house because you have less stuff to take with you!
Nostalgia and emotion make it hard to let things go
Often, our belongings are charged with memories and emotions. Childhood items or gifts from loved ones can be particularly hard to let go. We feel that we can hold those emotions, memories or people close by keeping the item.
Having some items linked to emotion and nostalgia is totally okay. I think it’s what makes a house a home! But this category can be too much of a good thing. Sometimes, you have so many nostalgic items that most of them spend their lives buried in boxes or hidden in cupboards. If you can’t see it, are you really enjoying it?
It is worth going through these items and finding out which are truly meaningful to you. Are they in good shape or beyond repair? Is it still something useful that you actually use regularly or seasonally? Display these key items so that you are really enjoying them. Everything else can go. Honestly, you won’t miss it as much as you think you will.
Sorting and clearing is hard work
Going through all your things and sorting them into keep, donate, throw is hard work. So people put it off. And the pile of stuff grows bit by bit. In the short term, it’s easier to just keep things, rather than the physical and emotional work of editing it all.
But it’s worth the effort.
Taking the time to edit your things can give you a calmer mind, a more enjoyable and beautiful home and support charities. It can save money, as you will avoid unnecessary purchasing by knowing what you have and caring for those items.
If this hasn’t convinced you to reduce your belongings for yourself: do it for other people. Do it so people you love won’t be left staring at huge piles of things when you die. Morbid but true. I am 100% behind death cleaning, but don’t leave it until you’re 80 to start managing your things. Make it a habit and reap the benefits.
It’s hard, but it’s absolutely worth it.
